Mom Jeans, Black Socks, and Other Things You Don’t Want in Your Closet

“It’s happened,” my husband Chris tells me solemnly one afternoon as we’re standing in the kitchen packing for a picnic.


“What’s happened?”


He glances at me sheepishly. Pushes the picnic basket aside and hoists his tennis shoe up onto the countertop, slowly pulling up his pant leg to reveal his ankle like some sort of Victorian bride.


My eyes widen. “Black socks?”


He nods. “The only thing left would be the sandals,” he says sadly, putting his leg back down.


“But why?” is all I can think to ask.


He shrugs, putting a few napkins into the picnic basket. “They’re actually quite comfortable.”


My husband and I had been worrying about this day. We made a pact, when we were about 25, that we were not going to do “old people” things. We were always going to dress cool, talk cool, be cool. We were not going to wear elastic-waist jeans or colored socks. We were going to be hip. Forever.


Our plan began slipping, of course, only a few years later, when we began approaching our 30s. Continue reading

Post-Holiday Checklist

  • The Stockings Not Hung ...Wrapping strewn on the floor; mom not caring … check.
  • Stockings no longer hung by the chimney with care (instead, strewn on the ground with the wrapping) … check.
  • Crumbs from cookies, eaten for breakfast; mom not caring … check.
  • Evidence of candy, also eaten for breakfast; mom not caring … check.
  • Children looking wonderfully satiated (might be a candy coma) … check.
  • Husband giddily playing with some sort of techno-gizmo … check.
  • Lights still lit on the tree; will remain lit until well after New Year’s; mom so thrilled with lights she doesn’t care that it could very well stay up until close to Super Bowl… check.
  • Teenagers still asking if we can have a “family sleepover” and watch movies all night … check.
  • All kinds of goodies not normally eaten at this time of year (some not even consumed yet – might even make it to the freezer) … check.
  • Three happy kids, one happy husband, very happy mom … check.
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...